Avoiding Sweatpants from 12-24-2008

The dieting season is once again upon us, and fittingly, I have a few interesting nuggets of information regarding your rear. I have been fortunate enough lately to shed a few pounds over the course of a couple months, and unfortunate enough to gain back half of it inside of a week. I blame Melissa's spaghetti dinner entirely. Anyhow, The following blew my mind and I thought to pass them along.
Have you ever blackmailed yourself? Would you like to? Name your price and flaab.com can make it happen. Yes, that's right; the website will blackmail you with your own money and pride in order to help you lose weight. It's quite simple, and I should have thought of this long ago. Here's how it works: You tell flaab.com how much weight you want to lose, and the target date by which you want to lose it. Then you pledge the sum of money you are willing to lose in order to obtain your goal. But wait, there's MORE! If you do not hit your target weight by the due date, your hard-earned cash will go to something or someone most undeserving (in your eyes). So say you want to lose 10 Lbs by February 14th - and you fail - your $100 will go to your worst enemy, your husbands ex, or the George W. Bush Presidential Library Fund. The choice is yours. Gulp. While this may sound positively motivating, realize that it won't make dieting any easier, it merely gives you more incentive to keep with it. Of course if you lose the weight, you are rewarded with your own cash, and not Kill the Whales. The website itself is pretty awesome. It doesn't try to candy coat weight loss. Current participants, or "flaabers" blog pretty consistently, leading to hysterical admissions about food, insecurities, even farting. In one blog, there is a rather unexpected picture of Tom Selleck - naked.
Take the following with a grain of salt: Another crazy addition in the world of dieting was learning that many stars take weird-ass drugs to keep their weight under control. Of course it isn't shocking to learn this, I just find it odd that no matter what gets published about a celebrities life, this kinda thing just doesn't get as much press. According to dailymail.co.uk (the UK version of say, TMZ.com) The prescription drugs Adderall and Clenbuterol are the go-to for Hollywood these days. Adderall can cause psychotic episodes, depression and serious heart problems while Clenbuterol is typically prescribed to treat respiratory problems in horses. In humans it can cause fat loss. Wow. Apparently, the use of these drugs are a far more legal alternative to sniffing coke to stay skinny. I don't know how prolific this is, but seriously wacky shit. Whatever.
Onward to my next topic: Meme Roth. Meme Roth is one of those folks who takes a good idea and going a liiiiiiitle crazy with it, thus alienating most of the general public. Seems Ms. Roth wants to wage a war on obesity, which is an admirable thing. However, she tends to get arrested in the process more often then not. She was escorted out of her local YMCA once because she threw away all of the toppings for the free ice cream they were offering kids that day. She's calling for a boycott of girl scout cookies because she doesn't believe that they should raise money from sweets. She even chided Michael Phelps for appearing on a box of frosted flakes. Her basic tenant is that we should not be "loving our curves" if we're overweight because the coming endemic of diabetes and other health problems will be crippling to our country, our health system, and not to mention ourselves. I was ready to dismiss her as some righteous skinny bitch until I learned that her whole family is GIGANTIC except her. She said she finally took responsibility for her own body and keeps vigilant of her health. I really cant argue with that.
So kids, as we round out the season of eating, bear in mind that there are plenty of people that go way more psycho about this kind of stuff than you or me. Cheers.